Key Cultural and Social Values

A key difference between Afghan and mainstream American cultures is that the latter stresses the independence of the individual while the former emphasizes the individual’s dependence on the family. "In Afghanistan, life doesn't belong to just one person," an Afghan commented. "Every decision is connected to the family – we are all tied together."

At the same time, Afghans are some of the most independent people in the world, disliking others, especially outsiders, telling them what to do. Indeed, one cause of the 1978-1979 uprising against Afghanistan's Marxist government was its attempts to interfere in the domestic sphere. In the United States, Afghans perceive school and social service agency intervention as undermining parental authority, responsibility and control, even demeaning marriage, the purpose of which is to bear and raise children: "What right do strangers have to intrude in our family and judge our discipline?" one Afghan refugee asked. "Our children are our responsibility." Some parents are so frightened by stories of children being taken away that they are afraid to discipline their children.

Afghans see family matters as strictly private. People are generally reluctant to share personal and family issues with nonfamily members, including health care professionals, though women may discuss their problems with friends, including non-Afghans.

While Afghans appreciate American freedoms and opportunities, they reject many aspects of the American way of life. In particular, they are shocked by what they see as the lack of hospitality and proper courtesy toward guests; in Afghanistan, for a child not to greet a guest would be a serious breach of manners.

The Cultural Orientation Project--http://www.culturalorientation.net, for more information contact sanja@cal.org
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